Oh Crap! – Musings of an Unperfect Mommy

Battling Burnout Again

August 18, 2011

I didn’t realize it until recently that I think I’ve got burnout again (or the beginnings of it) – can’t imagine why I couldn’t figure that one out sooner! Last week was the week from hell, but it also was a time for me to see what is going on with some of the kids’ behavior. That led me to buy this ebook, “Laying Down The Rails”, to give me ideas on how to deal with some of these issues that maybe I’ve not really addressed in awhile or at all. That depression bubble I’ve been in the last 3-4 years really did a number on some things, and when all you can do is barely take care of yourself, some other things get dropped. I also started reading “Real Learning” by Elizabeth Foss again – she has this awesome chapter on Battling Burnout and I’m going to put some of her strategies into practice to get myself where I need to be again.

The 3rd year anniversary of my crash is looming as well and every August I get tense as if anticipating it all over again – definitely a trigger for me. Not only was I going to crash, but my counselor was incredibly unkind which meant therapy after my therapy :-/. Now, I can look back and see my progress over the last 3 years and I’m so glad that most of that hard work is over. I only have a few loose ends to tie up with myself, and I am working on those as they pop up.

Add to that a kid moving out, kids in college, younger kids turning the corner into the teen years – well, you get the idea. Yep, I’m feeling overwhelmed again. Oh, and remember how I was going to take out time for ME this month? That ain’t happenin’! What is it about my good intentions? Oh yeah, I relized how much we need to play catch up now that we’re out of debt. Yet, it’s all going to get done if I just get my plan on and take it slow and easy. We had this wonderful priest – may he rest in peace – who always ended his sermons (or was it the Mass?) with “slow and easy”. At his funeral, at the end of Mass, we bid him farewell with those very words. I know I’m hard on myself, and I know I need to cut myself some slack, but some days it’s hard.

So, time to take it slow and easy, determine what needs to be done, how it’s going to be done (one habit/thing at a time), and then roll up my sleeves. However, I’ll add in time for myself to reflect and refresh because that is probably the most important part of any recovery – taking time for you.

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Girl of 100 Lists

August 11, 2011

Now, for those of you who LOVED the Go-Go’s back in the 80’s you will immediately recognize the title of this post as their song “Girl of 100 Lists” and if you don’t know, go look it up on YouTube :-). I loved this song and, more than that, it described me exactly! I have always made lists from the time I was a teenager and I still do. In fact I have several going right now:

1. School Supply List

2. Road Trip Shopping List (includes a list of books to look for at the used book stores)

3. List of books to get at the library

4. My August To Do List

5. My To Do List for this week

6. Get ready for school list (things I need to do)

7. A list of things I give my time to

8. Lists of changes I want to make in the house (a room by room list)

9. A list of Glad candles I want to look at

10. A revised chore list (still to be presented to the family)

11. Words that came to me that tell me about myself (I will have to blog about this one sometime)

So, are you getting the idea?

I am the girl of 100 lists

From what shall I wear

To who I have kissed

Check items off

Let nothing be missed

Sing I to myself and my 100 lists

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Happy Blog Anniversary to Me!

August 10, 2011

That’s right dear readers, I have been officially blogging for one whole year now! I have to say I’ve really been enjoying myself even though sometimes it’s hit and miss, but there really are days when you feel there is nothing going on or you have nothing to say. It’s how life is sometimes.

I’m sorry if I haven’t kept up with the Weekend Gallery or the Music Monday and I even dropped my thirtysomething posts as well. However, maybe I should challenge myself to keep up on those things for the next year.

Speaking of thirtysomething, have I mentioned that I am rewatching the first season? Well, I am, and enjoying it AGAIN. I want to finish up and start Season 2 on the day the first episode of Season 2 actually aired….yeah, I’m kind of weird that way.

Anywho – thanks for reading my blog for this past year and I hope you’ve had a laugh or two, enjoyed the photos, or maybe even been inspired by something here. I appreciate you all!! Here’s to the next 365 days to blog!

ETA: I almost forgot – thank you to my son Matt who helped me pull this thing together – that was a very fun afternoon and I thank you for all your hard work!

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A Cool August Day – Finally!

August 9, 2011

Yes, the heat wave around here has finally broken! Yesterday morning we had what is called an outflow boundary slide through here and knocked temps back into the 80’s!! Oh, it was bliss! The high didn’t get above 95 yesterday I believe and that is a far cry from the 110 and up range we’ve been having for awhile. This morning I awoke to 70 degrees – ahhhhhhh. I do feel that fall is on the way, the sun is going down earlier each night and the air just has that smell and feel of a change of seasons. Last night for supper we had pork roast and sweet potatoes – a decidedly fall meal!

So, this morning while it was still cool enough to sit outside, I grabbed a book and read a chapter. It wasn’t a quiet read for the sounds of birds chattering and squabbling in the background was plenty loud. I did enjoy it though and watched as the sun rose higher and higher in the morning sky. When it got in my eyes, that’s when I went in :-).

I need to spend more mornings like this, I had been before the heat got unbearable and it was a lovely time in my day to pray and think and then just be quiet. It’s hard for me to quiet my thoughts (or my mouth some times – hehe), but I need that time away from my other distractions. Hopefully as the month wears on and August gives way to September I’ll be able to do more of this again. I also wish I could find a nice patio furniture set so that I could have my coffee outside too. Or the kids could sit and draw (or I could sit and “draw”). Maybe now that all that kind of thing has gone on sale I can find something I like. Otherwise, there’s always next year.

So, what else have I been doing you ask? Well, it has been too hot to go outside and do anything and too hot inside the house to do much either. I remembered how I used to spend my summer afternoons on my school breaks – watching lots of reruns of old shows on the new cable channels :-). I went to Netflix and found The Addams Family and we’ve been watching two episodes every afternoon for the last week. Let me tell you I had no idea that Gomez and Morticia were such a hot couple back then! It’s just a reversal of the “perfect” American family and somehow I almost like the Addamses better. They were even homeschooling their children in the first episode – love it!

Speaking of homeschooling, I’ve been going through the school cubbies and cleaning them out, going through my old teacher notebook and culling there too and putting everything into a new (bigger) binder. I took stock of our school supplies and we don’t need too much there – did I mention I bought a globe? The kids are already enjoying it and it’s been awhile since we’ve had one around here. I’m also deciding on which reading and language programs to use for Becky and Katie and feel like I hit on a good plan for them. I still need to order Becky’s math and I’m heading to the used homeschool bookstore next Monday to fill out the rest of what I need. At the end of the month all I’ll need to do is put everything together.

And what’s on the agenda for today? A trip to the store for milk (I swear we really need a cow) and then some deep cleaning this afternoon. Otherwise, I plan to take breaks and put my feet up and relax – it is supposed to be my month off remember? I think I need to keep reminding myself of that and give myself permission to do things I enjoy that are for fun. I think many moms will tell you, we just don’t often think of our needs and what we want or how to get the help we need when we need it. It is something for me to contemplate.

Well, I think that catches you up on my news (except for the Hello Kitty fiasco at Wal-Mart on Sunday – I think I’ll just let that one rest). I’m off to put a load of laundry in. Enjoy your day!

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Two Good Things For Today

August 5, 2011

After getting frapps from Starbucks for Steve and myself I had this thought – I have two good things for today. Here they are:

1. I feel GOOD and it’s been a long, long time since I’ve felt this good. The anniversary of my slide off the edge is coming up, and I can honestly say WHAT A DIFFERENCE from 3 years ago!! And feeling good makes me feel happy inside…and out.

2. I can go to the store and buy what I want or need right now and it’s been a very long time since we could do that! I have been on both ends of that spectrum, and it is less stressful to be where we are now. However, I have learned a few lessons about money and contentment that I may not have learned had I not gone through all this. So, lessons learned is a good thing and being able to buy what we need or even a splurge like Starbucks is a good thing too. Can’t wait to do full blown school supply shopping :-).

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July Progress Report

July 28, 2011

So, I’ve actually started to lose weight this month! I have been much more active, been drinking more water, and added more fruits and vegetables to my diet. Not only am I losing weight, but I think I feel a little better it is keeping my skin clearer too. That in itself is motiviation, although as I’ve said before, I don’t think I’ll ever have pretty skin – I just didn’t get those genes. However, I can probably lessen my rosacea triggers and stress triggers (both of which do a number on my skin) by eating better and exercising more.

That said, at the beginning of the month I had a few emotional days that I needed to think about for a week or so. That’s how I deal with overwhelming situations – I sit back and think a little and sometimes it looks and feels like a mini depression. I just go with it, and give myself the down time to get through it. To me that is progress because I know what these situations are now, and I have found a way that works for me to deal with the stress/sadness/whatever.

We are winding up another three months of school and will be taking a break in August. What will I do with that time? Well, I’m not going to be washing walls and deep cleaning like I did two years ago, no, this year is going to be time for myself. I’ve worked really hard the last three years on many things and I need some time to do something that *I* like to do. and a project or two besides. I’m also considering a weekend yoga class – might as well try something new right? I’ll be writing more on my August To Do List next Monday :-).

At any rate, the last month has been good. We’ve had more money to buy some things that we needed, we wanted, a few extra things like the pizza party, and a reward for myself for a job well done on getting us out of debt. I’ve been able to put that mental energy I used to put into worrying about the finances to other uses, like my marriage and also myself. It’s good to have that back again! So, onward and upward as they say – here’s to August!

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Dr. Mom the “Vet”

July 26, 2011

I’m usually doctoring kids scrapes, but today I had to fix up a couple of Zhu Zhu Pets. Maggie’s just needed a little energy so I changed Sweetie’s batteries and she was just like new. Katie’s pet however wouldn’t even move, so I had to perform “surgery” to see what the problem was. There was hair caught up on one of the wheels. So, I got the tweezers and removed the hair. I was able to pop out the wheel base so I could get to it better and almost didn’t get poor Zhu put back together correctly. But, once I figured out how to put her innards back in place, I “sewed” her up. We tested her, but she still wouldn’t run, so I popped new batteries into her too and off she went. Katie’s frownie face was all smiles when she saw Zhu was zipping around like she should. Ah, all in the days work of this mom :-).

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Pizza Party!

July 25, 2011

As most of you know, a month ago this week we were officially out of debt – whooo hooo!! What you don’t know is that about a year ago, when all hell was breaking loose with some of the creditors, I decided that when we had made our last payment we would celebrate by having a big restaurant meal that we hadn’t been able to afford. Not to mention the 10 of us do not ever all go out to eat for the very simple reason – too expensive. Well, that and wrangling all those little kids – that’s a challenge. That said, we all decided on pizza and we chose Mazzio’s Pizza – a local establishment – for our place of celebration.

I made sure to arrive after the Sunday lunch rush for our sakes and the employees :-). The kids staked out a table while Mike and I ordered the food – 6 pizzas and drinks. What kind of pizzas you ask? Three sausuage, two Canadian bacon, and one cheese. Oh, and the drinks were free ’cause it was Sunday – bonus! Happily, I whipped out my debit card and paid. It was nice to just pay and not worry about whether or not we could afford it, or we would have to scrimp on something else to be able to do this. We paid with no worries whatsoever :-). Well, we made quick work of those 6 pizzas let me tell you and we were all stuffed to the gills when we left. Later on at home, we enjoyed homemade peach pie courtesy of Chris. After THAT we were in a food coma. It was a meal to remember!

So, I know the question on everyone’s minds is, will we do that again? Yes! I am already planning to save a little bit of money each month and go to Golden Coral over Christmas :-). Now, for your viewing pleasure, our pizza party!

The boys took a corner seat - all in all we sucked up 4 tables!

Here's the girls

Matt says, "R U Jelly?"

Mike - he's not always that serious. I just caught him unawares :-)

And here I am - yes, I took this one of myself.

Now you see 'em...

....now you don't.

"Mmmm, mmmm, that was gooood pizza!"

A toast to our family - cheers!

And peach pie for dessert.

My wonderful 8 kids.

Thanks to God for seeing our family through such a difficult time and to St. Martha for all her extra prayers on our behalf. Couldn’t have done it without you!!

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Happiness Is…

Playing hooky from church – I do have a good reason though – and sending your older boys out to McDonalds for breakfast/lunch because there aren’t any bowls to have cereal :-). ETA: they were all out of breakfast food and we had to settle for fries and burgers :-/.

Spending the morning emailing your brothers videos of British commercials from the 1970’s from You Tube.

Being alone in the house for 30 minutes while people are either at church or getting your breakfast!! ALL BY MYSELF!!! WHOO! I played Animal Crossing on Gamecube.

A big pizza party to celebrate being out of debt. Did I mention it was all 10 of us going. All of us to a restaurant… yeah, that hasn’t happened in awhile. Pictures and story tommorrow – it was a lot of fun!

Happiness is also making a list of what you want to do in August when you have a school break – it’s going to be fun! Well, except for cleaning the oven.

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This and That Thursday

July 21, 2011

It’s time for the return of….This and That Thursday! Here’s a few of the highlights:

1. Becky lost her first tooth on Monday.

2. Becky also got her own library card today.

3. I found a different way to scrapbook here. Even though they are out of the kits, I was able to get a binder, photo sleeves, and journaling cards to start and they’ll be here tomorrow!! Will talk more about it later – stay tuned!

4. Bought the real Bambi book by Felix Salten and I’ve read the first three chapters already – very good!

5. Bought a book on nature study so that we can do more outside stuff this school year – should be fun.

6. The car will go in tommorrow (Friday) – hopefully it’s an easy fix and we get it back same day. If not, our big pizza feast on Sunday will be postponed another week.

Well, that’s my week in a nutshell – hope yours is going well!

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