Oh Crap! – Musings of an Unperfect Mommy

May Progress Report

May 28, 2011

Well, the weight loss thing hit a big bump this month and I’ve gained a few pounds :-(. This just means I need to get my plan together for next month and try again. All is not lost, I just need to keep going forward and trying.

Today I was reading a thread on the homeschool board I am on, and got motivated about my own priorities for my life. The one thing that I need to do is get into a routine with the house. Last night I pulled out Keeping House and started reading it. The history of housework is an eye opener and worth the read. So, I decided to just git-r-done and I did get quite a few things done! I also revamped my homekeeping book to just 5 simple lists so that I have a blueprint for my days. It’s a good start!

Tomorrow I am taking some time off! I still have to do grocery shopping, but will also add in Starbucks and a few places to shop. I need some new jeans and shorts for the summer so will take a deep breath and do that too. I have come to really hate clothes shopping now that I’m so heavy. Some day, maybe, I won’t fear it anymore. At any rate, I plan to de-stress and have some fun.

So goodbye May with the gas leak fiasco, the tornadoes, the stress. Hello June and here’s to a new month full of the promise of summer and beginning new again. Isn’t that what we should do each day anyway?

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This and That Thursday

May 26, 2011

Huh – maybe that should be a new trend for my blog! My weekdays tend to be busy now that we are schooling again and this week has had some added stress so I’ve not blogged much.

I live in that part of the country known as “tornado alley” and believe me it lived up to it’s name this week! Because we were at such a high risk for strong tornadoes on Tuesday, I took the five youngest with me to a hotel to be at a safer place. Of course, the day after I found out that a couple of churches in town provided shelter – wish I had known about that sooner! At any rate, we did end up with a tornado warning but it wasn’t too serious and we had only light damage. Within an hour it was all over for us. I think we are all very grateful for that here! The fun part was the stay at the hotel – they upgraded us to an executive suite because they felt there wouldn’t be enough room for us all otherwise. WOW – was it nice! Two tv sets – one for the kids and one for me – a sofa bed, desk, dresser, coffee table, and even an ipod dock with speakers. Very, very nice!! Of course the next morning was a free continental breakfast which the kids all loved as well. I am thinking of taking a mommy vacation later this summer and I may just stay there again. ALONE.

My brother Dave visited us yesterday while he was in town. I was really hoping to get away to Starbucks with him for an hour or so, but he had so many other plans that it was shelved for another time. I think he just really needed a vacation and downtime so I’m glad he got that.

I got a stick blender for Mother’s Day this year! I have really really wanted one for a long time, but couldn’t decide on one, so I’m glad that my kids did that for me. I used it for the first time yesterday making broccoli cheese soup. Man, does that thing have some serious power!! However, I couldn’t figure out how to really move it around and I still ended up with a few chunks of broccoli that my kids left for yours truly :-). I have some butternut squash in my freezer and there are two good recipes in my Simply In Season cookbook so I’m dying to try those out! I think today we’ll make smoothies and work on figuring out how this baby works.

I’ve cracked out my summer music for the season and will be talking about that on Music Monday next week. I still need to replace my 80’s Summer Music cd I burned as I somehow misplaced it. I’ll be blogging about that too – I’m sure a lot of you will recognize many great tunes on it.

I’ve started a morning devotional time and I’m using Small Steps for Catholic Moms and also listening to my Hymns album on my mp3 player via a headset. I’m enjoying the quiet time of prayer and reflection.

I know I started blogging about thirtysomething awhile back and I’m sorry I haven’t kept up with it. However, I did finish watching the First Season episodes for a second time and this summer will re-watch with the commentary and start Second Season in the fall. I kind of feel like watching them once a week like I used to when it was on. I have to say, there were things that I didn’t catch the first time around! AND I also downloaded the thirtysomething soundtrack from Amazon! The music was so crucial to the show and it was almost like another character.

Well, I think that brings us to today which is a beautiful sunny blue sky day and is such a welcome sight after all the tragedy in the midwest this week. My heart goes out to all who have been affected by the storms and my prayers are with you too. God be with you all!

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30 Years Ago Today

May 21, 2011

Okay, it was actually on a Thursday, but it was May 21, 1981, that I graduated from High School. Yes, that’s right – 30 YEARS. I remember counting 30 days off after graduating and wondering what in the hell I was going to do with my life! What I really wanted was a break from the daily grind of school. I think my plan was actually to have a fun summer as always and then look for a job. My parents blocked that idea and less than a month after I graduated I had a job :-/. I still think the break would have been better.

Yesterday I was thinking about so many things as I went grocery shopping with REO Speedwagon in the cd player. Oh yeah baby, when “Take It On The Run” came on I cranked the volume up just like I did back in the day in my beautiful red Chevelle. It’s not quite the same when people see a 48 year old in a 16 pasenger van rockin’ out. For me? Still the same.

What was I thinking about? Spring breaks when kids went to the local lakes pale and came back brown and burned. Working in a school library and receiving a kiss from someone who I didn’t know liked me that way. A school trip to Six Flags over Texas – it rained that day. Prom had already been and my friend was no longer my friend (long story and to this day I hate prom). Punch and cake served by the Home Ec teacher for finals. Picking up cap and gown and realizing that my life was about to change forever. Graduation ceremonies that heralded the end of school (can we sing “School’s Out” by Alice Cooper here??). A party with beer and people that were drunk who I never thought drank! In case you were wondering, I didn’t – that would come later. So many memories and I go back through each one to ponder the meanings to see if there are any or if it was just life.

I have no idea if there is a 30th reunion this year – if there is I certainly haven’t heard about it. I probably wouldn’t go anyway – the 20th was enough for me. I was hoping to see the friend that unfriended me that last month of school and talk and she wasn’t there. I wish I could go this time and take Michael (an old BFF) so that we can have fun together the way we used to and shock people with our behavior. Sure, even at 48 I don’t always wanna be mature you know. Besides, Auld Lang Syne and all that :-).

Anyway, enough jogging down memory lane. Here are some pictures to commemorate the event. If you are remembering your graduation too – may the memories be good ones.

This is my senior picture. They cleaned up all the acne and even shaved my eyebrows. :-)

This was taken at graduation.

My yearbook, memory book, graduation announcement and program.

BTW – if you recognize any of these pictures or memorabilia and start telling super secret stories, I will have to censor you :-).

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Bird Funeral Today

May 19, 2011

I was on the computer reading my email this afternoon when Maggie and Becky came running up to me saying there was a dead bird in the yard. I yelled at the boys not to touch it and went out to see. The poor bird hadn’t been dead long – perhaps a day – and I have to say I felt saddened. It is a living thing created by God after all and deserves our care. Joe dug a hole to put the body in and, when he was done, Steve carefully took our little trowel, scooped up the bird, and carefully laid it in its grave. The girls got mixed up on their songs and it sounded like they were singing “The Wedding March” so I came to the rescue and hummed proper funeral music. After Joe filled the grave in, Maggie put some sticks as a marker on it. I went back to the house feeling sad for the loss of a bird, but glad that my children see this cycle of life and death as natural – which is as it should be.

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He left this morning

May 14, 2011

As he left and I waved to him from the porch, I thought how similar this was to when I dropped him off to Kindergarten that first day. How it was the first of many moments of growing up and leaving the nest little by little. I probably even wondered back then about when he left the house to go out on his own, but, ah, that seemed so far away. Now it’s here already.

So, Matt, Mike, Jeff, and Steve went down this morning to move Matt in. I gave Steve the camera with instructions to take pictures – he won’t let me down! It is an area in which he is quite talented. Chris will join them later today and then Jeff and Chris will spend the whole weekend with Matt in his new digs. I am really excited for all of them – this is a really fun time in life even if sometimes it seems like you’re nowhere really. I feel like he’s about to take off on his own and fly. I am proud of him and of myself – I think I did okay.

ETA: Matt responded to yesterday’s post here. WARNING – There is a bad word in there, but I think it’s worth the read anyway.

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As you leave home – A letter to my son

May 13, 2011

Dear Matt,

Tomorrow you leave the nest and head out on your own. It’s not the first time you’ve left home (the first was to go to college), but this is the final leaving most likely. From here you go to a new home and start working on your own life and your own traditions as well. I know that you will enjoy it. It will be quiet at first, and you may not know what to do with yourself being on your own, but you’ll get the hang of it. We’re not too far away for you to visit this time or for us to visit you (or come down pounding on your door when I need sanctuary – hehe). It hit me like a ton of bricks yesterday and even though I knew this day was coming, that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier. Nor does knowing that it is time for you to go out on your own give me any peace. We are and have always been very close – sharing a brain as I like to say – and I hope we always will be. Yeah, we’ll disagree, sure we’ll probably have an occasional fight, but that’s family life. The key to that stuff is to respect the other person and remember not to say stuff that will hurt deeply and regret you ever said it.

I kind of envy you because when I left home it wasn’t on the best of terms and I was so ready to be on my own even though I was only 19 and hadn’t a clue of how life really worked. It took me many, many years to figure it all out, and today I’m doing the best I can do having learned all those lessons finally. You have an advantage because we’ve talked about so much and I’ve lent my experience to help you see things that I didn’t. Of course the best experience sometimes is making mistakes – yeah, you heard that right, sometimes we do have to fail to move forward. I know you know that though, because you once told me to butt out of your life and if you make a mistake then you learn.

I’m so proud of you for all that you have accomplished in your life!! You have the job you have because years ago you found your passion and followed it with all your heart. I applaud that!! You did well in all your studies here at home and at college. You held your jobs well and performed to the best of your ability. You have been so generous in giving to your family and those outside even our country. Now, take all that you have learned, all that I have taught you (you do remember all of it don’t you??) and go forth and shine on in your life and in other’s lives. Your life is a gift – sometimes we can’t always see that, but it is. Live it that way – be thankful for all that you have because it’s a gift.

I’m sorry for the times when I failed as a mother – please forgive me.

I am always here for you to talk with and to listen. I may not have all the answers, but I can give you my thoughts and what I have learned along the way. I named you Matthew because the name means “gift of God” and you have been that. I love you Matt – always will no matter what.

Love, Mom

Now, here’s some blackmail fodder for everyone to enjoy :-). There were way too many to through and pick from so this is just a smattering. I found some real gems though and it was a lot of fun to go down memory lane.

The beginning of your life

OMG - look how young Dad and I are!!

You always have loved food - either that or you thought all it was good for was smearing it on your face.

Not sayin' a word about this one

Here you are at 10 years old

This was five years ago - look how you've grown!

I think this is 2007 before you went to college

Off to college - 2007

Grown up and ready to go out on your own..*sniff*

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While I’m Mulling Things Over…

May 12, 2011

I’m still sorting through the events of the last week and also contemplating this weekend when my oldest son moves out on his own – the beginning of my brood leaving the nest. I’ve started about 4 different posts and was not happy with any of them, so I went outside today to take some pictures. It is starting to look and feel more like summer now and don’t want to waste a moment to capture some of the beauty of the great outdoors. Enjoy!!

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Monday’s Gifts

May 10, 2011

I was hard pressed to find something good about today but I did. Out in the backyard we have honeysuckle growing – LOTS of it!! I was sitting outside this evening and just smelled the beautiful sweetness all around me. A nice breeze is blowing and birds are singing to each other and flying through the trees. These are my gifts for today and I am holding them in my heart tonight.

Tuesday Morning Edit: I lay down in bed last night and began my night prayers and these are the gifts that were revealed to me:

1. A full day of homeschool done after 3 days of chaos last week.

2. A living room that smells fresh and clean and like a house again and it gives me peace.

3. Two good nights of sleep.

4. Half price Frappuccino’s at Starbucks (esp. the Mocha Coconut one)

Thank you , Lord, for all your gifts to me. Forgive me if I take anything for granted – I try not to, but I am human after all.

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A Mother’s Day Gift

May 8, 2011

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An Oh Crap Week

May 7, 2011

Yeah, we had another crisis – a gas leak in our house…okay, under the house, but it was still a gas leak. I will give a write up with details later, but just wanted to let you know I haven’t vanished, I’m just needing to be silent and rest. It was a rough week to say the least!

In other news, Matt, my oldest, leaves home next week to start a new life on his own. Am I happy for him? Yes! Am I sad to see him go? *sigh* Yes. That’s a whole ‘nuther post though.

So, hoping you had a good week and no crises at your places. I’ll be back tomorrow with the scoop.

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