Oh Crap! – Musings of an Unperfect Mommy

Someone needs to give me a heads up next time

November 5, 2011

Have you seen that orange juice commercial where someone is sitting at a table at breakfast, and surrounding that person are other people. It’s like a business meeting really because these people are there to tell the other person that their day is going to suck. What does that person say at the end? “Good thing I have my orange juice.” Actually, they should be thankful they got a heads up so they could be more prepared than just by drinking orange juice. Anyway, if that had happened a few weeks ago, this is the conversation that would have taken place around MY table:

Me: What have you got for me?

Mailman: I’m going to put a letter in your mailbox today from a collection agency. Apparently, the credit card company says you still owe.

Me: Swell! What else?

Husband: First, I’m going to leave the light on in the van all night, and the next morning the battery will be dead. Oh, and I should have told you two weeks ago that the front tires are in bad shape. One is bald and the other has wires showing through. You’ll find out on your own the day before you have to go on a trip out of town.

Me: Excellent! Next?

Ambulance Driver: You will not be able to wake your daughter up one morning and have to call us at 6 am to check out what’s going on.

Me: Wait a minute, my mom was in the ER not that long ago!

Ambulance Driver: Sorry – we just get ’em.

Me: Well, all righty then. And you?

Hardware Store Man: I’m going to help you find a new stove because the one you have has a burner that is dying. You know, the big one in the back that you use to cook your mega sizes of food every day?

Me: Super! Anyone else?

Neighbor: I’m going to knock on your door and I’m not there to invite you to coffee, I’m going to tell you that there is a water main break right on your front lawn. You are going to get a lot of attention and not the kind that’s enjoyable.

Me: Sounds great! Good thing the Loony Bin is just two counties away!

3 comments
Comments

On November 5, 2011 at 1:51 PM, dxprog said:

Well put together. That would be nice to have a heads up, but still shitty in the end.
But, perhaps it's not orange juice you need. Maybe you need... MORNING RESCUE! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PD-_oLjmCGY

On November 12, 2011 at 1:30 AM, Joyce said:

Well, yuck! I'm sorry!! I ordered new burner parts for years. I think I replaced them all at least twice. Can't you get a new part?
(hugs)

On November 15, 2011 at 11:39 PM, java_queen said:

Husband says it's the connector so...I'm really not sure if it would be worth it to replace it. I haven't looked into it too much - too busy cooking on it :).

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